Boris Johnson deported to home planet

8 May 2018

Mop-haired humanoid and walking embarrassment Boris Johnson is to be deported to his home planet on the other side of the solar system.

 

Boris fell victim to the government's tough post-Brexit restrictions on immigrants.

 

Close sources confirmed the confirmed alien found himself submerged in Mrs May's 'hostile environment' policy, though allies say things have been uncomfortable at Cabinet for months.

 

Much of that about Johnson's home planet remains a mystery to the electorate, though research has shown the alien voted overwhelmingly for Brexit.

 

Johnson's placement on Earth is thought to be part of an attempt by alien species to infiltrate foreign governments.

 

The plot has been dubbed the 'Putin Plan'

 

The plan involves posing as a self-absorbed, overgrown public school boy and running as a Conservative.

 

Nigel Farage, former chief demogogue of the United Kingdom Irrelevance Party, has expressed concerns about other aliens hiding in British politics.

 

Mr Farage was tackled before he could identify any supposed aliens.

A Fake News article (yes, you've got it, this isn't real news) brought to you by Backbench.

 

Subscribe to our weekly briefing to wish Boris well on his voyage off-planet.

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